My Speach.

So today I attended the funeral of Desmond Mann. After the funeral I then returned to school and was Supposed to make a speech, with Morgan, at his memorial that our school was holding. But I didn't get there in time, so Miss. Christiansen made a speech in my place.
Not the same effect.


So in case you were curious as to what my speech said, here is a copy. I hope you enjoy.


Desmond Mann was one of the most brilliant people I knew. He would always listen when you had a worry. He would always be your friend. He was involved with every school event, especially Volleyball and the Vision Generation Group.

Des, being the kind, generous, helpful, happy, selfless, influential, knowledgeable, spiritual man he was, would want us all to be happy, to smile, to celebrate the life he lived. He would not want to see us cry. He would want us to realise that he has done everything God planned for him to do on earth.

Des' role in this school was obvious. He was our shoulder to cry on, our person to lend a hand, our mentor, our coach, our chaplain, our friend.

He played volleyball, read books and donated to charity. With his booming laugh and bird whistle, we knew he was near. Every corner you turned you would see his happy, friendly face. He spent lunch breaks with students, he bonded with them. He was one of us.

There were many happy moments we shared with Des, and these are the memories that will not soon be forgotten. Volleyball trips will never be the same without Des to take us on continuous Maccas runs to fuel our appetites, to whistle and distract us while we are playing, to spike the ball dangerously close to us, and most of all no-one to support and encourage us even when we make the silliest of mistakes.

Des would do everything and anything for a friend in need. We often took him for granted, not realising what a wonderful person we had before us, never thanking him enough, or expressing our gratitude towards him. As I have spoken to many of my fellow peers and as messages have been passed onto me, there are words that have a common recurrence, three in particular; Inspirational, Happy and Helpful. So on behalf of everyone, we thank you. You have left a large hole in our school and it will be very hard to fill.

A day won't go by in which you will not be missed. You have impacted on so many people's lives, you certainly have changed mine. You were a great man.

Rest in Peace my friend; I hope to see you again someday.

Megan Jane Thomas

AT&PS

I wrote a song about you.
Oh, really? :)
Yeah, It's called bitch in a uniform.


Love this movie.

I'm such a girl.

Desmond Mann.

According to dictionary.com, death means, "The act of dying; the end of life; the total and permanent cessation of all the vital functions of an organism."


When someone passes there are many people they unfortunately have to leave behind. This is not something they choose to do, but it is the sad truth. Unfortunately, Desmond Mann, A great friend of mine, made such an impact on so many people, the truth is unbearable.

Today when I arrived to school as normal I didn't even consider the day that was layed out before me. I was confronted my a crying friend. They broke the news to me. For about half an hour I was in shock. I could not, would not, comprehend what was put before me.

As I looked into the eyes of friends the tears began to came.

I then cried for about 2 hours.

I later came to the conclusion that Des was a very happy, joyful man and would not want to see us cry. I later cried some more but composed myself soon after.

Des would not want us to mourn, he would want us to celebrate the wonderful life he lead. To celebrate the massive impact he had on so many people. To basically remember the wonderful, grateful, selfless, knowledgeable, happy, helpful man he was.

This is a very tragic event that will take many people a while to comprehend and overcome.

RIP our Chaplin, our mentor, our friend.

Megan Jane Thomas

Jennie Ida Byrnes

You have this ability to make me see a completely different side of you every time we are together.
There are many faces to the Ida Saga and I'm privileged to see them.
When I first met you I never imagined we would have a friendship quite like we do.
I never imagined I would see these sides of you.
I'm quite pleased to call you my friend, and as much as you hate to admit it, you feel the same way.
I know sometimes I can get too affectionate and you pretend like you hate it. But I know you deep down, deep deep down, thoroughly enjoy it.

In Conclusion.
Love you lots like Jelly Tots ;)



Megan Jane Thomas

♥

"Tayla, I'm Sorry"

I have decided that I don't like the bitchy woman I am becoming.

I have noticed recently that I have been saying mean things and not being as nice to dear friends as I could be.

And I regret everything I say. It's not just to Tayla, I have noticed these expressions to many people.

So right now I am asking you to help be.

Be cruel and tell me when I'm out of line etc.

I want to change who I am and I Believe you are the person to help me do so.

Because of your ability to not care what people think, and your expressions of opinion.

Which I do usually admire.

I guess what recently happened was it just took me by surprise.

That's the one down fall of the Internet - sarcastic, bitchy, enthused, happy tones are not portrayed.

This often leads to disappointments and misunderstandings.

I liked how we were during the holidays. I was really enjoying your company and I was somewhat addicted to the feeling.

I want it to be how we were before.

I know that since this incident occurred We have not really spoken to each other - because we have not been around each other, not as a result of the situation.

And I just hope when I do see you next there are no sour notes, No harsh feelings, No bitchiness.

When I say I Love You, I do truly mean it.
You are a very dear friend of mine.

I value you enormously.

I would dearly miss you if you were out of my like.

And I have been thinking about this all day.

I don't want to dwell on it any longer.

So with my final words I will say the two most fitting to the blog.

I'm Sorry.

Megan Jane Thomas

don't take offence to this.

"You know when someone says,

"no offence",

you automatically take offence to it.

So, Don't take this offensively."

It's interesting the way that works.

So right now I will quote something that a dear friend has said many, Many times before.

"It helps if you write you feelings and thought down, It makes you feel better"

This is exactly what I did in my last blog session.

I was feeling Unenthusiastic about school, so I felt like I needed to re inspire myself. which is exactly what I did (by looking forward to FTV)

And come to think of it, also by realising that I'm usually successful in all my subjects, i have never failed a subject, test, assignments or essay before.

Call me selfish, but it's true. and I'm proud of that.

So by me writing these words I have changed the way I think. Which is a very good thing.

I agree with you on your views of change.

Therefore, by me writing this, I have changed my views on school which is what I was hoping to achieve.

There have been many blogs that a friend of mine has written that are to inspire themselves, and not necessarily to have an impact on others.

Why can't mine be like that?

Why did you have to think I was directing this to the people of the Internet community.

I was planning to go back and read that blog when I was feeling bored with school, to redirect my path.

That may be why you thought I was speaking to you, but I wasn't. Simply writing to myself.

You may be wondering well then why did you post it on your blog if you didn't want people to respond. Well I posted it as an addition to my collection, so one day I can look back and remember the exact mind frame i have been in over the past 4 months.

This was not intended for you.

I did not mean for the blog to offend anyone.

My mother dropped out of school also in year 10, in the 80's.

That was what people did back then, they dropped out if they weren't going to be a Doctor or a lawyer.

I'm not saying people who drop out are unsuccessful. In fact they may be more successful then myself.

But these are just things I don't want to do.

So if I'm ever feeling how I was again I can remember this blog and rethink my actions.

Now Tayla, This blog is of course not directed at you. "I Love you".

Don't take offence.....

Megan Jane Thomas

Make a Choice

This is the clip in which I was refering to in my last blog.

Now you might understand the feeling I was refering to.

death is peaceful, easy. life is harder.

"Home alone.

Who knew it could be so Inspiring.

Satisfying.

Underrated."

Where is he?

He's asleep. He never leaves.

What happened?

When you broke your leg, You lost a lot of blood, Fell down 2 flights of stairs. Through a window.

I Just watched Twilight.

For some reason I find this movie very relaxing, inspiring.

Due to my completion of first term of FTV i have found that in that short learning period i have a new understanding of films.

Watching Twilight for the 4th time ever with this knowledge has made me see it so differently.

So many amazing Montages.

Just a powerful Soundtrack.

Influences from Social, Economical and Political, Audiences, Technologies and Institutions.

This is a very inspirational movie.

Not in the sense I want to move to Forkes and find a Vampire boyfriend.

But in the sense that I'm excited for the future of film.

I can't wait to begin my next project.

I have so many ideas swimming through my mind, I don't know which one will keep up my straight A FTV reputation.

I used to think i would basically just make a short narrated film.

But after really thinking about it, I now realise what a Montage really Is.

For example, If you direct your eyes to the Twilight DVD I know you all have, and Fast Forward to the end of chapter 13. 1 hour, 37 minutes.

That minute or so Montage is a true representation of the technique and what it can achieve.

I continue to replay this section of the movie. Just developing all my thoughts.

Ill be keeping my Straight A's.

Watching this Minute Sequence I can't help but think back to my death blog.

As I re-read my blog, I think about the impact I have made on myself, and the potential within me to make an impact on others.

On second thought watch from 1:37:40.

During these holidays I have been dreading the re-start of school. The assignments, essays, homework and workload.

But now i somewhat look forward to school. The creativity, the inspirations, the friends and the mentors.

As I look back on my life so far I am pleased with what I have so far achieved. But I can't Help but look to the future, what I can achieve. What I will make of my life. Who will be my Edward, clean my blood, give me life.

Now, as I Begin to bid you adue. I ask you to think of your life so far, and the potential you have to make your future more worthwhile

Just tough out these last couple of years of school, It will be the most rewarding pain you will endure during your 80+ Years.

Live those 80+ years as best you can. When your a teenager don't get caught up in rebellious practices. You have your whole Post Graduation life for all of that.

Speak to any school graduates and they will tell you that these are the best years of your life. You may not be able to purchase alcohol, get into clubs, or drive a car. But when you have something others don't, like an education, a roof over your head and clothes on your back. Just be grateful, don't ask for more, don't wish your life away. Just live with what you have at this exact stage in your life. You can think about your future and the graduation of school will be your most valuable tool.

People drop out of school not thinking of what they need. You may be failing every subject but just completing school, you may not receive your senior certificate, but finishing 12 years of education should thrust something upon you. You may not do your assignments, complete essay or answer tests but what you learn in class can be done subconsciously. By dropping out you are not helping yourself in any way. You can still go to tafe after school, after you consume this knowledge. It's a mistake your making.

Pay attention to the lesson your learn, the friends you have and the mentors you gain.

Take something away from every person you meet, every vampire, werewolf or human.

Take something away from every day you live, every fall, every class, every fact.

Remember, because you never know when this information will come in handy.

Live your life as best you can.

Finish school, Build a career, Produce a Family. Make a Life.

Our parents raise us until a certain age. They form the soil in which we grow.

When you reach that certain age you make your life your own. You live it by your rules.

This is all I have to say.

I hope I may have helped you to make decisions, or re-think already made one.

Look back on pre-conceived ideas of people. And Look to the Future.

What is most important in life?

Megan Jane Thomas

My dad paid me to come and talk to you. He said, quote, We'll be watching.

Tell Him thanks.

I leave you alone for two minutes and the wolves descend.

Terrible Ass Shit 10 Minutes.

"I hate Oxford Street.

I hate Grilled.

I hate the Cinemas.

I hate Memorial park.

I hate Doggers.

I hate Life."

So I was going to lunch and the movies with mum.

Before we even found a park I saw something unbearable.

I cried and went home.

My Holidays were going so well. And then in one moment they suddenly went completely downhill.

I hate the way life does that. Just when you think everything is starting to brighten up. Your loving everything about where you are in your 80 year long journey. And then suddenly, in less than a day, less than an hour, less than 10 minutes, you suddenly feel worthless, like no-one wants you around, like your not good enough for them.

But, for some odd reason, you do find peace.

Peace in tears.

I have only just stopped now. 30 minutes.

But I might cry again some more.

oh yes here it comes.

Note to self:

Don't talk about crying when your trying to stop.

I was so happy with my life.

I have a great group of friends.

I was, for once in my life, happy with the way I look. I felt beautiful.

But then, this one occurrence has made me feel insecure, alone and unwanted.

I'm the kind of person that needs friends to survive so I wont be publicly dwelling on this.

Once these people speech to me I will not show anger towards them. I love them.

And one in particular I basically crave her approval. So how can I overcome this?

Yeah I'm not sure either. But there is one friend that I have come particularly close with recently. And this person was not present with the others that made me feel this way. I will be spending the day with this good person tomorrow.

They will make me feel worthy again. Though we are creating something to celebrate our friendships. I'm not sure how I will go with this. I'm sure tayla will help me through though.

I love her.

Well I'm going to go wallow in my own self pity.

You know, I thought only people in movies felt this way. I guess at least this will help my drama performances. I have now experienced another emotion. I have broadened me horizons.

So maybe when I'm delivering my Oscars acceptance speech I will thank these friends.

According to Dictionary.com

A friend is a noun.

It means A person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard. A person who provides assistance. A person who is on good terms with another.

Well... isn't that just dandy. There are a few people now who I am not currently on good terms with. I don't provide assistance to them, nor will I sympathize with them. I do not feel affection towards them.

Now, don't get me wrong, these feelings will most likely last another hour tops. But I think by writing this blog. By telling my self the words I am feeling this will some how help me to feel differently.

A great friend once told another who was feeling down to write their emotions and thoughts on a piece of paper. This is a great piece of advice, Instead I am posting this on the Internet in hopes that these people who have hurt me will read this and realise what they have subconsciously done.

Like I understand that they may have thought I was going to work today. But I got out of it to do something more enjoyable during my holidays. I ask one of these hurtful people if they wanted to do something today. They just said they were busy, end of story.

I then ask many other people if they were free. It seemed to be that everyone was busy, turns out they all had plans. No-one went into an elaborate description as to hat their plans were exactly.

As if they were keeping something from me.

Why couldn't they save me the trouble of seeing them all together and just tell me before hand that they were about to rip my heart out.

Why did this have to happen.

I may be over-reacting but this is how I currently feel.

I am just writing down what my mind is thinking.

I can't help the way I feel

Well I'm going to go now

I'll stop boring whoever the hell has no life and is ready this.

Bye.

Megan Jane Thomas

Laptopp;

"I got a laptop.

It's pretty cool.

I like it a lot.

Thank-you Dad."

So I haven't blogged in aggggeeessss.

I just pretty much haven't been bothered.

Don't be offended, it's not your fault.

It's not you, it's me.

.....

so that got a little awkward.

anywhooo....

i got a new laptop today, it's quite beautiful.

then a car backed into my mum's.

don't worry, no damage, she is still in full working order.

so yeah just thought I'd update you.

so basically i told this guy i liked him, he took it really well....

... a little too well...

i think by him taking it so well has made it awkward. it;s quite odd.

oh well ill just be happy he hasn't acted like a total dick about it.

I'm happy.

so I'm beginning to move on from him, and I'm going quite well with that.

maybe the fact that I'm not seeing him is helping.

I'm not looking forward to school

another reason for not looking forward to school is 3 things.

1. Maths assignment

I haven't exactly started and its due in like a month :S

2. English essay

in 2 weeks; haven't started even thinking about that :S

3. Voice of youth speech

haven't started and its in a month.

I'm screwed

this is not going to be a very good couple of weeks.

so in advance, I'm sorry for not blogging.

ill see what i can do but don't expect terribly much

alright so i have my traineeship tomorrow so i wont carry on much longer.

bye

Megan Jane Thomas