waves a crashin

One thing can kind of set of waves of emotions

I'm pretty down at the moment, because I have sort of stepped back and analysed my life. Why do I kind of get the "left-over love". It's like everyone is giving everyone else their love until their full, then I just get whatever's left.

I'm most likely over-reacting, because that's what I do. But I'm just sick of everything about my life at the moment. I'm sick of the same routines I fall into everyday. Why can't one day I ride a horse to school or something. Or what if I take completely different classes. Or what if I sit with different people. I guess people that I would feel appreciated around, and not singled out.

I'm pretty much the only single girl left in my group. and it sucks ass. I thought I was okay with it. But I'm really not. Because at lunch there always seems to be an odd number of people. I'm the odd.

Everyone just seems to have someone. Or someones. But I really just have no-one.

I feel like I will always be "the single one". But I'm also the advice giver. So it's extremely hard when people come to me for relationship advice, because I get angry when they complain about having someones love.

They don't really understand what that sort of stuff means to me. I don't have what they all have. and I fear I'll die alone.

I'm just sick and tired of caring and making decisions. I'm so over everything.

This is a terrible time for me to be this way, I have done hardly any school work this term, and if I don't start on assignments, I'll soon crumble under the stress. I just need an extreme pick-me-up. But I cannot see one coming anytime soon.

I'm sick and tired of this stress and disappointment.